Babies!

Okay, so if u know me..you've probably learned or heard that i like NEVER want kids. That i'm so happy with just being married that i don't need any little punk kid in my life! And i used to mean that too. I used to think.. Babies are cute, but just not for me. I even WISHED that i wanted a baby because i know Dusty does! But i just didn't. But lately, I do Not know what has gotten into me. All of a sudden this baby-ness is all i can think about! When i'm in stores i always notice all of the cute babies now. I always wanna look at the Cute baby clothes and it's so unlike me, i think! (No offense to Mandi here)...but i always would tell Dusty i felt SO uncomfortable around Carsen because I don't know how to act around kids and Carsen is so affectionate and it just made me.. nervous? and I dunno why! But the other day I was at Mandi's and Carsen kept saying "Hold me, Stefanie, Hold me!" and he'd give me hugs and OH it was just SOOOO cute! I loved it haha. Today a lady who used to work here brought in her 3 week old baby and it was just so precious! She let me hold him and i swear i almost got a little choked up how much i loved just holding a little baby. But i know what ur thinking.. Come On Stefanie, U are Only 18! And i know it too. I feel so much older all of the time, and i wished i were. What do U think? This is actually plum embaressing to talk about...haha. But ok i'll stop boring you with my childly dreams now :)....